Why can't they just shut up and get my coffee?

What is it with the folks at Caribou? Why can't they just take my order and get my coffee without trying to be my new best friend or trying to tell me what great folks they all are?

All I want to do is order my coffee (large dark roast with room for cream--not because I use cream but because if you don't tell them to leave some room between the coffee and the lid, it will spill all over your suit before you get to the car) pay my money and get on with it.

No, I don't want to buy one of your silly cards so you can get several weeks of my coffee spending even if I get hit by a bus. No, I don't want to tell you about my weekend or hear about yours. Yes, I know it is Monday and am not particularly bothered by it.

Today, I place my order and look up for the trivia question so I can use my vast store of useless information and earn an extra dime to drop in the tip jar. Today's question was rather long, but involved "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" which made it a good bet that I would score with this one. However, the guy behind the counter started trying to tell me something very important about the latest charity to which they are giving 10% of their profits. Good for them. Do you want me to donate my spare dime (or $0.20 if you shut up and let me read the trivia question)? I try to read the question. It must be a tricky one since any coffee shop regular is going to get any "Bill and Ted" question unless they go deep. But I can't. The earnest little man keeps telling me what wonderful folks they are and how this is such an important charity. Okay, whatever. I know you are good guys and that the Al-Queda rumors aren't true. The other person rings me up and I get my dime back before I can even read the stupid question.

The answer was Keanu Reeves! A laydown question and I couldn't even get it because of the yammering. I'll get you guys. It is Starbuck's for me for the next few days. Although, the problem with Starbuck's is that they don't have large and get all offended if you don't say "Venti".